


Wear Your Pearls And Your Best Fake Smile

by estriel



Series: Quarantink 2020 [17]
Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Break Up, Idiots in Love, M/M, POV Outsider, Quarantink Challenge, Sad with a Happy Ending, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 16:29:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23433346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/estriel/pseuds/estriel
Summary: Ayaka is not particularly interested in skating, not even now that she’s with Javi, but Yuzuru Hanyu is a big deal in Japan, and well, one does get curious.
Relationships: Javier Fernández/Javier Fernández's Girlfriend(s), Javier Fernández/Yuzuru Hanyu
Series: Quarantink 2020 [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1665598
Comments: 9
Kudos: 76





	Wear Your Pearls And Your Best Fake Smile

**Author's Note:**

> Today's #quarantink prompt: _earrings_. Well, this was an interesting experiment.

She’s almost excited to meet him, Ayaka thinks as she applies lipstick and clips on her earrings, her favorite pearl ones, even though this is not a date. She’s not particularly interested in skating, not even now that she’s with Javi, but Yuzuru Hanyu is a big deal in Japan, and well, one does get curious.

Hanyu turns out just as advertised, and when they sit down for their drinks, she has to admit that she does see the charm – unfailingly polite, with an infectious laugh, and even though he is not her type at all, Ayaka can see how for many people he would be. 

Javi is next to her, clutching his beer, his free arm loosely draped around the back of her seat, and he’s all smiles. She is enjoying herself and so it takes her a while to notice that the smiles are… well, different. And not directed at her, for the most part.

The moment she becomes aware of this, it is hard to focus on anything else. The way Javi’s eyes seem drawn to the man sitting opposite, brighter and more alive than she remembers ever seeing them. The way Javi absentmindedly reaches across the small table when he’s telling Yuzuru about the job offer Brian had extended. The way his hand lingers on Yuzuru’s wrist just a moment longer, the way his voice skips excitedly when Yuzuru says, _I hope you come, Javi_. The way Javi nods, and responds, _I think I will_, even though only yesterday he and Ayaka had agreed that they would have to think about this decision, about relocating to Canada, about what it would entail for the two of them. The moment she sees, she cannot unsee.

When Yuzuru’s eyes snag to her, he must notice her discomfort, because he blinks and the light in his eyes dims as he pulls back into his seat, biting his lip. At least one of you is not completely blind, Ayaka thinks, taking in the way Javi just seems to _glow_, unaware of what he is doing.

Hanyu finishes his drink a little too hastily, bowing to her as he makes his exit – which of course he can’t make before being drawn into a long hug. She tries not to see the way he fits into Javi’s arms. Like he belongs there.

Back in their hotel room, she takes off her make-up and her jewelry, and stands in front of the mirror, brushing her teeth. Javi chooses that moment to step in – he smiles and wraps his arms around her, kissing her shoulder, and she wants to believe that he’s thinking about her when he does that, she really does.

As she goes to sleep that night, Javi’s back warm against her spine, all Ayaka can think about is how much she looks like all of Javi’s previous women. She has never dwelled on it, she’s not the jealous type, but now it strikes her – slender, dark-hair, dark-eyes, a dazzling smile. All she can think about is how much they all – including her – were in a way simply female versions of Yuzuru Hanyu. It’s not an easy pill to swallow.

She lets Javi go about his business, which mostly consists of doing work at the Cricket Club, teaching – temporarily, for now, seminars and such – while she does her own work remotely, and tries not to think of the Japanese-Spanish relations that have nothing to do with the Spanish Chamber of Commerce in Japan and everything to do with her boyfriend.

She watches as Javi comes back tired, but elated, and – increasingly – distracted, his touches and kisses growing a little half-hearted, as if his mind was not really in it, as if it was somewhere else. When she mentions it, a gentle joke, nothing direct, he shrugs and tells her he’s just so happy to be back, and he loves coaching, and he’s a little preoccupied with work, that’s all, he’s sorry, _I’ll make it up to you_.

It’s not like he does anything _wrong_. He doesn’t talk about Yuzuru constantly, in fact, he barely mentions him, after that first outing. He doesn’t treat Ayaka badly. He doesn’t gasp the wrong name the one time they have sex during the two-week visit to Toronto. But she _knows_.

When she tells him she wants out, Javi looks at her, eyes wide, looking like a deer in the headlights. “But I thought we were in love,” he says, and he looks so lost and honestly confused that Ayaka almost feels sorry for him.

“We were. _You_ are,” she says, and watches Javi furrow his brow further. “Just not with me.”

She books her own room and enjoys the rest of her time in Toronto, taking herself out to the theatre, and shopping, and to the best patisserie in town, according to TripAdvisor. She tries very hard to make the most of it. But she still cries every night because she is, actually, in love with Javi. That is why she’s letting him go.

He comes to pick her up on the day of her return flight. He, of course, is not flying back to Spain just yet, mumbling something about hashing out the details with Brian while he loads her suitcase into the trunk of the rental car. Ayaka would have been fine calling a taxi, but Javi had insisted to drive her, since he had kept the car, and since she had paid part of it.

It’s strange, sitting there and watching Javi drive in silence. He’s clearly nervous, clearly out of sorts, clearly feeling guilty, but underneath that Ayaka can see just how very vibrant he is, how very… _happy_.

They look at each other awkwardly when he drops her off at the terminal, and she wills herself not to cry, not now, not where he can see. He is not a bad man, he had not broken her heart on purpose, she knows. She doesn’t want him to suffer. But mostly she doesn’t want to lose the last shred of pride she still has.

“Thank you, I suppose,” she says eventually.

“For what?” Javi shrugs. “It’s the least I could do,” he adds, nodding towards the car.

Ayaka shakes her head. She lifts her hand to touch his neck, brushing her fingers across the darker spot that might look like a play of light and shadow, a mere smudge. It would look like that to anyone else, probably. But Ayaka had spent the past forty minutes, the time it had taken them to get to the airport, staring at Javi instead of the passing cityscape.

“Thank you, for at least waiting until we were no longer together,” she clarifies, and drops her hand.

Javi blushes, his own hand shooting up to cover up the love-bite. “I – “

“Have a good life, Javi,” she says, not wanting his apologies, or his explanations. Mostly she doesn’t want to think about this, or about Yuzuru Hanyu, and how perfectly his mouth must have fit to Javi’s throat, just as the rest of him fits to the rest of Javi. “Goodbye,” she adds, and turns, and walks away.

She’s going to be fine. And she’s going to buy herself something nice. Like shoes. A bag. Or a new pair of earrings.

**Author's Note:**

> Liked it? Hated it? 
> 
> Btw, Ayaka is a name I made up for Javi's Japanese partner, we don't know who they are (yet) in real life.


End file.
